From the man with the self professed voice like a Hyena dry humping a blender, this is Lucha Review: Lucha Underground Season 3, episode 18: Evil Rising.
Right off the bat, I have to know what in the hell they are smoking down there in Boyle Heights? Lucha Underground was always way, way left field but they have reached a roadrunner level wackiness at the moment. Rabbits, lizards, dragons? Tell the weed dealer to maybe tone down the peyote a bit I think. But they have not steered us wrong so far, so let’s roll with it and see what these crazed lunatics can wow us with next. Have to say I am loving where this storyline with Mil Muertes and Prince Puma is going. The addition of Vampiro to anything makes for must watch television and I have a feeling we are not going to just see a normal blow off match on this one. We shall be needing violence and blood, lots and lots of blood! (Oh waiter, another round of Ritalin for me please.)
A reminder of how far back this feud goes. Ultima Lucha in 2015:
My one gripe is the addition of Crane in this whole twisted saga. He just feels added on and wasted here. He is really good enough to have his own feud and to keep well out of the way when Puma and Mil rip each other to shreds again.
Our first match of the night is (future ex Mrs. McKay) Sexy Star vs Mariposa. I have nothing but love and respect for these ladies and they have done more for women’s wrestling in a short space of time than the so called women’s revolution over at the E ever did. Sorry if I’m hating on the product, but I have become so bored and disillusioned with WWE lately. (But I will save that for another article). (EDITOR’S NOTE, HE’S NOT REFERRING TO WHAT THE WWE WOMEN THEMSELVES ARE ABLE TO DO) The match was just too short and one doesn’t want to do it but we will always compare any match they have with the legendary No Mas match from season 2. I know it’s not fair but I would give what to have another match like that again. It was over way too quickly with Sexy getting the pinfall. And what in the name of Sir Isaac H Newton’s inflamed pink nipples did Marty do? He just slammed her without a second thought, I mean what the hell was that?! Very strange but let’s roll with it and see what takes place down the line.
Hope you enjoy your face, Marty.
She’s coming to rip it off your skull!
Okay, it’s bitching time (send granny to bed and close that damn Smurf porn tab you have open.) I don’t understand the purpose of the White Rabbit tribe in Lucha Underground. They get hyped for what feels like ages and then they arrive all weird like and it looks cool and different and they just lose. Whatthefuckthatabout? There is nothing really special about them except that they are weird. Their matches are okay but nothing to write home about. This is one of the very few times Lucha has tried something and it has not worked. Maybe I’m expecting too much but they will need to rethink this group seriously. As for the Lizard tribe, very bad ass and I can really get a sense of who they are. Plus the addition of Drago makes me a very happy little wrestling fan. Lucha has struck gold here and must make the most of it. As for the match between the two tribes, it was okay but the Lizards did the most of the work for the win. Is it not clear to you already? I.don’t.like.the.Rabbit.Tribe. I loved seeing Aerostar and Fenix near the end to make the save for Drago. Man, I simply adore this trio and they always put on one hell of a show.
For the final match of the night we have Johnny Mundo vs The Mack. Listen to me very carefully Lucha Underground, sign Mack to a long term contract right now. This man is a shining diamond in a already star laden roster and he simply has it. He doesn’t look like much (me being the judgmental bastard that I always am) but the man can wrestle! He has that special gift that can raise a crowd to their feet and it won’t be long before The E comes knocking to try to sign him (I’m seeing another New Day disaster in the making). Mundo is brilliant at what he does and he plays the heel like a master but I think the time is rapidly approaching where the Mack will be carrying gold around his waist soon. An excellent match with the Mack dominating until the riff raff of the World Wide Underground interfered. Mundo stole it as usual but the thought of an Iron Man match next week has me licking my chops. This could easily be on par with the legendary IronMan match between Puma and Mundo, if not better.
We end the night with Mil coming out and turning Vampiro to mush. I like how he told Puma to stand back and to not interfere. Puma still needs time. storyline wise before he can face the man of a thousand deaths. I for one cannot wait!
You may now return to your usual reviews of wrestling.